Services you didn't know you could simply buy.
SomehowShop — also written Somehow Shop — sells loyalty tests, catfish checks, ghosting reports, platform takedowns and honest verdicts on your chats. Bought once, delivered discreetly. No account, no subscription, 18+.
- Secure card payment
- Turnaround stated per offer
- Discreet handling
- One-off, no subscription
Sale — up to 29% offSale — up to 29% off selected services
Shop →Shop the sale →The catalogue
Every offer
Loyalty Test
A friendly, non-explicit approach to your partner. You get the full transcript and an honest verdict.
Prank A Friend
A harmless, well-scripted prank on someone who deserves it — with the whole thing captured for you.
Second Opinion On A Chat
Send the screenshots. Get an outsider's blunt read on what they are actually doing.
Profile Audit
Your dating profile, taken apart honestly and rebuilt line by line.
Break-Up Message Written For You
You describe the situation. You get a clear, kind message you can send exactly as it is.
Catfish Check
Send me their profile and photos. I check whether the person you are talking to is real and report back with evidence.
Get Them Banned
Someone broke the rules and the platform ignored your report. I build the evidence pack and file it properly until a decision comes back.
Kill The Fake
Someone is pretending to be you or using your photos. I run the impersonation and copyright routes in parallel until the profile is gone.
Why Are They Ghosting Me?
They stopped replying. I reach out to them neutrally, ask what happened, and report back what they say.
Coming soon
Chat, Gaming & Voice
Own page in preparationPaid company by text, game sessions and voice calls are moving to their own page. Not bookable yet — it is in preparation.